I had another conversation yesterday with one of my friends that read the recent posts on marriage (part I and part II). With her permission, I have the opportunity of posting the conversation on here:
Another girl: I don’t have the view that we should enter marriage by faith
Me: *laughing* You r a realist. You r not like most girls
Another girl: Except of course the girl is getting old and she wouldn’t mind. No one said d boy should have mansions, but he should be able to take care of me. No man builds a house without first considering d cost- Jesus said so. He’ll start from somewhere and we’ll build together, God will take over
Me: Hmm, but it’s easier said than done you know. How many people are really ready to take that leap of faith- That we’d build together?
Another girl: Do u think where d guy is, is all that he’s going to be? That means u r marrying a non-potential. You keep building till u die. He can’t grow? Even if d guy is very wealthy before u marry him, does that mean he can’t have more? There’s always room for growth.
But that doesn’t mean d guy won’t have anything on ground. Basic things, a steady job, a house (rented most probably), car, and most importantly emotional maturity. A guy can have all those and still not able to hold down a marriage, so it’s not even all about all we can see, there are ingredients that make marriages work, and most guys I know these days, don’t have it
Me: Hmm, I see. So what in your opinion are those ingredients?
Another girl: Well what does maturity comprise of: There’s wisdom, Ability to forgive, Self-control, Not looking at your marriage as a ticket out of doing things yourself…I’m not an expert so I know there’s more…
Same goes for the girl, let’s not forget that.
Food for thought:
Continuous self development is necessary as we strive for perfection.
Our ability to understand our differences and work with and around them is key to a peaceable existence.